Best Quote Lately Reincarnated

[Chimera]

Chimera: "I used to get inspiration in the shower. Now I get it in the bathroom in general. My creativity must be growing."
MsFish: "There are things growing in my bathroom, but it's not my creativity."

[42]

Things you don't admit in front of 20+ people:

"I have a paralyzing fear of getting a paper cut on my eyeball." --anonymous

This was followed by:

"Hey, it's a legitimate fear." --anonymous being defensive.

[Nessa]

Oldie should appreciate this one. And I liked it so much I stenciled it to the wall in my boys' room.

[Oldie Black Witch]

LOL! That's awesome! I'm so tempted to stencil it above my boys' pigsty room, but I think my landlord would only be amused for about five seconds.

I need to think of one for "boys." Maybe "a swirling melee of chaotic mess"?

[fuzzyoctopus]

Nessa, that is awesome

The announcers on the OSU classical radio station are usually so boring and stodgy.  Then we get this on Halloween.

"And coming up later today we have a new piece by Beethoven.  Well, um, a new recording, actually. Beethoven has written very much in the last few years."

[Peter Ahlstrom]

From Heroes' most recent episode (I can't remember the exact quote).

Card gambler: "You guys are going to the bathroom together?"
Hiro's friend: "That is the way we roll."

[Spriggan]

Mathematical Requirements listed for the job I recently applied for (Intern Server Admin).

Ability to add and subtract two digit numbers and to multiply and divide with 10's and 100's. Ability to perform these operations using units of American money and weight measurement, volume, and distance. REQUIRED

[Harbinger]

Two unrelated quotes, the first serious, the second joking:

"It's like they're playing Russian roulette, but with their lives."

"Americans are the only ones with souls. That's why it's okay for us to torture everyone else, but not for them to torture us."

[Chimera]

Benedict: When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I would live until I was married.

--Much Ado About Nothing

I love this play. And I love the movie with Kenneth Branagh and Emma Thompson. 

[Maxwell]

"God ****ing Da**it why can't I be addicted to something normal, like crack.

[Chimera]

Gus: What is it?
Lady: Someone's here to see you. A Lieutenant Crunch?
Shawn: (in a civil war re-enactment uniform) Actually, I've been promoted. It's Captain Crunch.

From Psych, my new favorite TV Show. 

[The Lost One]

A person from Arizona said this to me,

"The first time I shoveled snow was when the big blizzard hit here in Denver. I shoveled the drive way, got into my car and realized I couldn't leave because I put all the snow at the end of my driveway."

[Entsuropi]

After the war, Conqueror returned to Faslane, flying the Jolly Roger, a customary act of Royal Navy submarines after a "kill". When asked about the incident later, Cdr Wreford-Brown responded, "The Royal Navy spent thirteen years preparing me for such an occasion. It would have been regarded as extremely dreary if I had fouled it up."

- From the wikipedia article about the HMS Conqueror (a nuclear powered submarine) sinking the ARA General Belgrano during the Falklands war.

[FirstMateJack]

Mathematical Requirements listed for the job I recently applied for (Intern Server Admin).

Ability to add and subtract two digit numbers and to multiply and divide with 10's and 100's. Ability to perform these operations using units of American money and weight measurement, volume, and distance. REQUIRED

Can you do all that?

[Aen Elderberry]

Mathematical Requirements listed for the job I recently applied for (Intern Server Admin).

Ability to add and subtract two digit numbers and to multiply and divide with 10's and 100's. Ability to perform these operations using units of American money and weight measurement, volume, and distance. REQUIRED

Can you do all that?

It doesn't say "Ability to correctly add and subtract" so I could probably do it.