Best Quote Lately Reincarnated

[The Bot]

Did he care to elaborate?

[Nessa]

He just really loves strawberries. I'm assuming that he means he's so happy to be eating them, that he wiggles with delight.

But then again, three-year-olds aren't very articulate, so who knows.

[Maxwell]

Zoe:Harvey share with your brother
Harvey: but it's my train.
Zoe: Harvey everything belongs to everyone
Harvey:You're a socialist pig taunta zoe.

I think three-year olds are plenty articulate.

[Nessa]

That sound less like being articulate and more like repeating what other people say.

[Shrain]

"Secret identities aren't just for superheros and Garth Brooks anymore."
             --Strongbad

[Harbinger]

I'm not a "spelling" major.

--My VB teacher, unsure how to spell "algorithm."

[fuzzyoctopus]

"What am I doing in the libarary wearing a blanket? And with my pet pink dragon?"

Me to my husband, while playing with the new Yahoo! avatars.

[Shrain]

Sometimes my parents really crack me up. I called to say hi in between Sunday sessions of conference. I was talking to my mom and I asked her what the heck she was doing because I couldn't hear her.

"Oh, I'm, uh, opening a box of Cory's cookies from Good Earth. He'll probably get mad at me because they're for a trip tomorrow. They're really expensive too--$4." (Cory is my brother, by the way.)

I laughed because my mom is famous for pillaging sweets from us kids. "Well, then don't open 'em. Stop, mom, while you still can!"

"But they look really good, and I'll only have one." Crackling noise ceases. "Mmm, they're vanilla ones. Really good."

My dad enters the convo. "Hey, Tessie, I want one."

"Alan, you just got through reminding me that they're Cory's, and now you want one too?"

"Just one, come on."

Grumbling, she gave him one. "Oh, I how I hate that he always has to copy me all the time!" she told me. Then, to him, "Hmmph. Why do you gotta copy me all the time? And why'd you just give me grief over opening them in the first place?"

Boy, my parents can be so crazy. I love that they were sneaking cookies from my brother in between sessions of conference. lol

[42]

Conversation I should  never have had at work last night.

Guest: "I would like a 2:45 a.m. wake-up call."

Me: "Due to day-light savings, we will not be offering 2:45, would you perhaps be interested in 3:45 or 1:45?"

[The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers]

apparently, this conversation happened last night at 9pm eastern. which is 7pm Utar time:

Jeff (my little brother, upon my mother calling him back): I was trying to get ahold of you guys. Where were you?
Mom: I was with a friend. Your father is at Priesthood.
Jeff: oh. yeah.

[Faster Master St. Pastor]

"Another day, another Mexican."
--A mexican acting as a member of the border patrol.

[Harbinger]

He's dag-nasty evil. Everyone else can sense it. Why can't you?

[Faster Master St. Pastor]

The only reason I think it's funny is because it was said by a Mexican. I've found that racist jokes are only funny when told by a member of that race.

[Maxwell]

well in that case let me treat you to a jew joke,
Q:What's the difference between a jew and a canoe?
A: A canoe will occasionally tip.

and this is one of my father's favorites
Q: why do jews have such big noses?
A: Because the air is free.

If this is offensive to anyone I apologize, however I'm fairly certain I'm the only jew here. And if you find this offensive and are not jewish, well, I guess you should lighten up.

[The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers]

I find it offensive because I have a big nose! wait.
neither part of that sentence is true.