Warbreaker: Free Ebook

[SexyTurtle]

I definitely started reading this less than 24hrs ago and completed it. I literally read, finally had no choice but to go to sleep for a while, then woke up and finished it.

I really liked it. I couldn't stop reading....

As far as critique,

Most of the Vivenna chapters, until she met up with Vasher, were a struggle to get through. Her close minded bias was so strong it irritated me to the point of boredom?

I really loved the foreshadowing -- like the painting of the war that Lightsong looks at, that reveals Lifeless + Shashara w/Nightblood.

I liked that there was at least a comment about how Susebron could use his tongue after not having one for so long. I also thought the name was spelled Suesbron halfway through the story, then when I noticed it wasn't, I thought the spelling as Susebron wasn't as cool

I would have liked to have seen a few scenes of what was going on back in Idris during the rest of the story. I kept wondering how the king had taken Vivenna's disappearance, and how the build up of their army was going.

Huth and ....oh I can't remember the names of those two cities, but anyway they are mentioned about 3 times in the story, and then slightly more clearly at the very end. I felt like there should be a bit more explanation when they were mentioned.

Maybe a bit more relation between why the royal's hair color changes and their lineage from the Returned. And a better last name than Royal? Maybe that was just a place holder for a better name.

I was deceived on so many levels....I trusted Denth, and so many others. That was impressive. I would have liked to have been able to make a better opinion of Suesbron's priests, but I never saw how they interacted with the god king. I know that may have given it away, but I also wondered about what was going on during the day when Siri was running around and Suesbron was...wherever? And I would like to know how is mother died.

I really loved the way Blushweaver (if that's the name, I don't feel like looking back to find it) was developed. I didn't like her at first, and then I loved her. Not enough to cry during her death tho. I'm big on the whole getting so attached to characters that I cry....I don't know how to offer any advice on that.

Well that's my critiques for now. Again, I really loved the story. I hope my comments are constructive. ^_^ And yea, I'm totally buying Elantris, the Mistborns, and Warbreaker when they're all out <3 I'm gonna borrow the 2nd Mistborn from my friend in the next few days (gotta wait for the paperback before I buy it, I'm a poor college student   ).

[DaleDe]

I just finished version 4.2 and I loved it. I found about 20 typos or so but the book flowed very well. The only critique is with the prolog. Everywhere in the book the awakening was accompanied by a voice command and it was stated that this was a requirement but in the prolog a voice was not used in the first spells. This is inconsistent.

Note that I love eBooks and read this, after conversion, on my eBook reader.  I hope you will consider publishing in eBook formats as I much prefer this to reading hard copy books. I looked at some of your earlier offerings and they seem to be only paper.

Dale

[rjl]

This is the first book of Brandon's that I have read, and I have to say that it's a very good advert, I'm now intending to buy Mistborn and Elantris the when I next have a decent amount of free time.

Having said that, there are a few problems with it.

Ignoring typos as I know this is a draft, a few issues strike me:

Do returned get hungry and have to eat? Lightsong says that they don't, but then Susebron seams to suggest that he often gets hungry at night, and sends for food when the whole thing about Siri being hungry from growing her hair comes up. I personally think it would be better without the idea of the returned not needing food.

What's up with the God Kings vanishing after they have children, if as is suggested at the end the priests aren't guilty of foul play, what happens to the God Kings?

I don't think Vasher is explained properly, how can he use the command to give his breaths (on Denth) away without giving his "divine breath"? I thought it always gave everything.

Also the book seemed to lack polish in a few places, it didn't seem to flow quite right,  from time to time, but I'm sure you're editor will be able to help you far more than me on this, I'm a reader not an editor or writer.

[DaleDe]

This is the first book of Brandon's that I have read, and I have to say that it's a very good advert, I'm now intending to buy Mistborn and Elantris the when I next have a decent amount of free time.

Having said that, there are a few problems with it.

Ignoring typos as I know this is a draft, a few issues strike me:

Do returned get hungry and have to eat? Lightsong says that they don't, but then Susebron seams to suggest that he often gets hungry at night, and sends for food when the whole thing about Siri being hungry from growing her hair comes up. I personally think it would be better without the idea of the returned not needing food.

I will take a stab at some of your questions:

I think they don't need to eat but then they may still desire to eat. If they had to eat then they would die without food.

What's up with the God Kings vanishing after they have children, if as is suggested at the end the priests aren't guilty of foul play, what happens to the God Kings?

I understood this to mean that the extra breaths were removed in a way that the priest died before he could reveal it. Then the God King just becomes a regular returned. I am sure Vasher or someone knows how to remove all the extra breaths that the God King has.

I don't think Vasher is explained properly, how can he use the command to give his breaths (on Denth) away without giving his "divine breath"? I thought it always gave everything.

Well he did give away everything and became a drab (or whatever they were called) just as Viveena did at one point. He has some breaths in clothing that he used to get some back later but it was kind of a neat trick. He could not, of course, get back what he gave Denth. Only the returned died when they gave away their breaths.

Also the book seemed to lack polish in a few places, it didn't seem to flow quite right,  from time to time, but I'm sure you're editor will be able to help you far more than me on this, I'm a reader not an editor or writer.

Dale

[Spink_Longfellow]

Been awhile since I've made a comment. It seems a little mundane to me but clarification would be relatively easy. There is mention of 300 years rule by the God-Kings. Klad the Usurper being the last to have a Queen of the Royal bloodline. Klad having split the kingdoms, leading to Hallandren and Idris. However, the Idrian king made the treaty to marry a female Royal away only recently? His treaty only a lifetime old? Klad had started the Manywar but this timeline is unclear. I'm just trying to figure it myself, any ideas?

[rjl]

I don't think Vasher is explained properly, how can he use the command to give his breaths (on Denth) away without giving his "divine breath"? I thought it always gave everything.

Well he did give away everything and became a drab (or whatever they were called) just as Viveena did at one point. He has some breaths in clothing that he used to get some back later but it was kind of a neat trick. He could not, of course, get back what he gave Denth. Only the returned died when they gave away their breaths.

But Vasher is a returned, that's the problem.

[SexyTurtle]

Rhuan has a very good point.

I think the food thing needs to be a little more clear (craving vs needing), and the Vasher thing is either a large plot hole or something that needs a bit more information.

I can't wait for the next version of the story, I'll definitely read the entire thing over again in a heart beat ^_^

[dawncawley]

I am not the author, but let me see if I can help a bit.

Klad/Peacegiver/Vasher is Returned, and one of the Five Scholars. He was the start and the end of the Manywar, but as he said, history has a way of not wanting to see that the person who began a war could also be the person who ended it.

I don't know for sure if he is the original Returned, that the Idrian Royals are supposedly related to, but he is very old. I think the 300 year mark is accurate.

Having read the first and the last version, and some of the middle ones but not all, I will say that flow has improved, as has the characters. Every re-write gives a bit more, so I am sure some of the little things will be seen to in later drafts.

The food issue with Susebron, and Vasher and Denth, who both eat throughout the book, and Lightsong, who says he doesn't "need" food, but enjoys it is a bit confusing if you let yourself think about it. I guess I had mainly glossed over the eating parts, I mean I read them but didn't ponder them as much as other parts. Now that it is there, sure, I would like to know if this is an inconsistency, or if there is a difference between a normal Returned and say, Seb, or Vasher.

So, I hope I helped. 

[Spink_Longfellow]

I think that part of my ponderings were answered there. However, I imagine that several of the big looming questions that pop to my mind are to be written into the next book or shouldn't be answered at all. When I read or write I want to think, but not too hard. There is a balance of moderation where you assume your reader/author has a level of intelligence. That said, you still write or read at a fourth grade level. I don't think there is any need to make yourself seem smart as an author. The story will speak for itself.

[Chrynoble]

I just finished 4.2 and although I haven't read any previous versions, I noticed that you have made changes to the character of Parlin. In prior versions you said he was too overbearing on the story, but I think in this version the pendulum may have swung too far the other way. I kept wondering why he was there, and what his point was. Then he starts wearing the hats, and I found myself just wishing he would go away. When he is killed I thought "Oh, thats what he is for, plot hook fodder".

I would add some content to show, as you have suggested, that he and Vivenna have a close, but perhaps forced relationship. Most of this could be done by simply starting Vivenna's story earlier and allowing us to see some travel time. If not that, then I would consider removing the character altogether.

Whatever you end up doing, I would have liked to feel like Parlin's death meant more to Vivenna than just a gruesome scene.

Other than that my only suggestion is to add a table of contents. I was able to do this easily with words auto-reference tools and found it was very helpful when reading the book over several sittings.

Having dispensed with the (hopefully constructive) criticism I have to say I really enjoyed this book. It was also good to see that some of the parts of the book I was struggling with, are also the parts you have rewritten and plan on working on. I will defiantly look froward to other versions, and the final publication.

I was also happy to see that you intended his book to be less serious than your Mistborn series. While I haven't read that series yet, it is good to know you can write both the serious and less serious aspects of fantasy. I wouldn't go so far as to call Warbreaker light hearted, but it certainty wasn't dark.

I will admit as my final remark that I read Warbreaker to gain some measure of understanding of you as an author now that you hold the reins of Robert Jordans great saga. Thank you for posting a complete work with which I could get such a sense. I know that wasn't your original intention, but I think it sets at ease many of the uncertainties Jordan's fans have felt in regards to the future of his work.

[reskar]

Hi, new to the forums. First post actually. I finished 2 of your other novels and really liked them but won't go into that here. I've read your first 6 chapters that you've posted on your website and I'll continue to read them as they come up. Since you seem to be inviting feedback I thought I would mention this:

In the prologue Vasher kills Vahr in exchange for his breath. What surprised me was Vahr's willingness to die. Why did he not demand that Vasher helps him escape for his breath. Was it too hard to free Vahr but not too hard to free himself? Did Vahr not want to live without Breath? This point seems to remain unclear.

I have been enjoying your novel throughly I just felt that this point might be worth addressing.

[rjl]

reskar, you know he's made the whole book available as a .doc: http://www.brandonsanderson.com/drafts/warbreaker/WarbreakerFull4.2.doc
or a .pdf: http://www.brandonsanderson.com/drafts/warbreaker/warbreaker4.2.pdf

I don't think washer would contemplate releasing Vahr, as Vahr's aims would conflict with Vahser's.

[SexyTurtle]

I liked Parlin for being quirky, and I wouldn't mind if there was more coming from his part of the story. I'm not sure how long the book is supposed to end up being, but it'd be great to have some chapters from his POV. I think he is important for putting more emphasis on how the sister (finished the book a couple weeks ago and def. forgot her name) is so close-minded while he accepts change and flows with it. Did I mention how frustrating she was....lol

[BlackWiz]

I really enjoyed this book but one thing kind of bugs me now.  How can returned have returned siblings (Arsteel-Yesteel, Denth-Shashara)?  The odds seem to be a bit to great for two returned in the same family and they lose their memories anyway.  I guess they could have adopted eachother later but that seems a bit unintuitive.  Come to think of it, Shashara and Yesteel might not even be returned (5th hightening grants immortality, don't technically need to be returned, and Shashara died in the Manywar anyway).  It is sort of implied that all the great scholars were, but that isn't enough be sure.

[Spink_Longfellow]

BlackWiz, I think that you were only slightly mistaken. I might be wrong too, but I think that the scholars had reached the 5th heightening (or probably higher) but were not naturally returned. I think the command that Vasher used "Return" merely took him to the returned state, a benefit of the 5th heightening.

Spink_Longfellow