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Author Topic: Signs your child is a Devil-baby  (Read 7996 times)

The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers

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Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« on: June 06, 2006, 11:43:02 AM »
- the horns on his head

- voted most likely to battle Jesus for the souls of men and women

- the head spinning 360 degrees? Yeah, that's not a good thing.

- not in IT, but keeps talking about how excited he is to be working with Bill Gates.

- doesn't tease cats. Instead sacrifices them on an alter.

- goes into politics or studies law

- plays D&D

- prefers d20 to GURPS or Palladium

- the cloven hoof thing is not a deformity. Nor is it "just a phase."

- just celebrated his third 6th birthday in as many years.

- can't get enough Tom Cruise

- lingering aroma of brimstone after he uses the restroom

- constantly urging you to "come down off your recliner and turn these stones to bread"

- While other kids are asking for XBoxes and new bikes, he keeps asking permission to bring sickness upon the house of Job

- brings a 7-headed dragon home and asks "can I keep him?"
« Last Edit: June 06, 2006, 11:51:44 AM by SaintEhlers »
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fellsmum

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #1 on: June 06, 2006, 12:16:43 PM »
-- runs a web site that attracts all the other devil babies
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Spriggan

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2006, 01:05:37 PM »
- Likes the Backstreet Boys.
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Shrain

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2006, 01:13:43 PM »
--Sets the thermostat at Hellfire of the Damned.

--Insists on watching Teletubbies while carving odd symbols into the coffee table.

--Hands out Jolly Ranchers to all the kids with braces.

--Sells strange little dolls on eBay that come with two boxes of straight pins.

--Knows how to spell Beelzebub and Microsoft.
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Spriggan

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2006, 01:42:28 PM »
- Has 2 iPods
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42

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #5 on: June 06, 2006, 06:42:58 PM »
- has a forked tongue

- leaves horrible scorch marks on the floor when he comes inside

- is planning for a career in customer service
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Spriggan

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #6 on: June 06, 2006, 08:04:27 PM »
- Has a twin who's a Lawyer.
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FirstMateJack

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2006, 06:01:35 PM »
Has a pamphlet entitled "The IRS and your career"
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The Jade Knight

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #8 on: June 30, 2006, 07:34:31 PM »
 - Is [Mormon/Jewish/Atheist/Evangelist/Catholic/Christian/Muslim/Buddhist/etc.]
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Rak-O-Latern

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #9 on: July 27, 2006, 06:21:14 AM »
- Eats the Dog/Cat/Brother
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fuzzyoctopus

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #10 on: July 27, 2006, 01:24:40 PM »
Eats the evil curtains before the evil curtains eat him.

;D
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Faster Master St. Pastor

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #11 on: July 27, 2006, 06:29:08 PM »
-Likes Sony's world view
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chunktile

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #12 on: July 30, 2006, 08:33:28 PM »
-- his favorite day was 6/6/06

-- voted for Bush & Kerry

-- likes pork and fights for it, yelling "The sow is mine!"

-- watched The Omen 666 times

-- fingerpaints pentagrams
« Last Edit: July 30, 2006, 08:36:23 PM by chunktile »
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The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #13 on: July 31, 2006, 12:22:04 PM »
Chants "kill the pig, bash its head, spill its blood" while living on an island of only children.
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chunktile

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Re: Signs your child is a Devil-baby
« Reply #14 on: July 31, 2006, 02:49:31 PM »
-- kids mistake him for Mr. Tumnus before he stabs them with a pitchfork.
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If everyone is different, then no one is the same. With no definition of the normal, aren't we all insane?
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