Author Topic: They walk among us!!!   (funny)  (Read 1314 times)

GLE

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They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« on: August 17, 2006, 11:04:10 PM »
This is a funny e-mail i got. and this is part of it.


Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old
fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying:
"Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the
fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It
looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge
for sale $50." The next day someone stole it. Caution... They Walk Among Us!

Another:

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone
shouted...."Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky
and said..."where???.......
They Walk among us!!

Another:

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent
which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the
sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in
the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the
east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I
don't keep up with that stuff.".......
They Walk Among Us!!

Another:

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day
>I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center
>was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day,
>7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?"
>Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" ......
They Walk Among Us!!!

Another:

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we
overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the
sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in
a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car
was moving". .......
They Walk Among Us!!!!

Another:

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut
through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the
trunk...
They Walk Among Us!!!!!

Another:

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The
cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount on
both....
They Walk Among Us!!!!!!

Another:

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to
the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never
showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry be cause she was a
trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me,
"has your plane arrived yet?"......
They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!

Another:

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small
pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he
would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some
time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think
I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces. Yep, .......
THEY Walk Among Us,
too.!!!!!!!!

GLE

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2006, 11:16:35 PM »
If you have any other funny stuff i would like to hear it!

Zal

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #2 on: August 18, 2006, 12:48:00 AM »
i thought you said you were gonna save some for me and dave.
pity.  


GLE

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #3 on: August 18, 2006, 01:02:49 AM »
sorry.... you left... and dave didnt care... so i put all of them on

Skar

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2006, 01:16:40 AM »
Not bad.  Rather amusing in fact.  I shall contribute.

My brother's history teacher asked the question, "Who can tell me why gravity works?"  My brother raised his hand and said that, as he understood it, no one knows why gravity works.  The history teacher rolled his eyebrows and explained in a condescending tone that everyone knows that we stick to the Earth because the Earth is spinning. Centrifugal force and all that. The teacher and the rest of the class laughed at my brother for not knowing something so obvious.
They walk among us!!!
"Skar is the kind of bird who, when you try to kill him with a stone, uses it, and the other bird, to take vengeance on you in a swirling melee of death."

-Fellfrosch

Zal

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #5 on: August 18, 2006, 01:30:00 AM »
                


                                 No Trespassing
                             Violators will be shot

                       Survivors will be shot again


GLE

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #6 on: August 18, 2006, 01:54:43 PM »
 ;D nice guys i like them!

Zal

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #7 on: August 18, 2006, 07:30:06 PM »
Gle, you've heard the fridge joke right?  meh, i'll tell it anyway.

3 guys die and go to heaven, and saint peter says, "whoever of you died the worst death gets in."  so the first guy steps up.  
"well, i was just standing on the balcony of my 20th story apartment, when i slipped and fell off!  and i was falling and falling, and as luck would have it, i caught onto the railing of a lower apartment!  i started trying to pull myself in, but some CrAzY guy starting stomping on my fingers!  and when i wouldn't let go, he got a hammer and beat my hands to pulps!! so i fell, and again, i got lucky and landed in a bush.  i said a quick prayer of thanks, but then next thing i knew, there was a refridgerator falling out of the sky at me!  so i died..."
Saint Peter nodded. "That's pretty gruesome."
the second guy stepped up and said, "Well, i knew my wife was having an affair, so i came home from work early to catch the guy.  i got home and my wife was in the shower, but when i checked on her, she was alone.  but i knew he was there, so i looked EVERYWHERE.  and the last place i looked was out on the balcony, and sure enough, there was the guy trying to get back in.  so i STOMPED on his fingers, but he wouldn't let go... so i grabbed a hammer and beat his hands to pulps.  and he fell, and OF COURSE... he landed in a bush.  so i went inside and picked up my refridgerator (it weighed a TON) and dropped it on him n' killed him!!  then i felt so bad, i shot myself."
Saint Peter nodded.  "That's pretty gruesome."
The third guy stepped up, looked around nervously, then whispered, "okay.  picture yourself hiding naked and wet in a refridgerator..."   ;D


Faster Master St. Pastor

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Re: They walk among us!!!   (funny)
« Reply #8 on: August 19, 2006, 02:27:24 AM »
Could you guys please use proper grammar and spelling!?
« Last Edit: August 23, 2006, 09:43:18 AM by OneEyedGreenPerson »
"elantris or evisceration"-Entropy.