How stupid?

[Entsuropi]

Pulled from http://www.nov-net.com/jd/

Alright, this was posted on Stardestroyer.Net, and I just have to preserve it for posterity.

The following mind-boggling attempt at a crime spree in Washington USA appeared to be the robber's first and last.

1. His target was H&J Leather & Firearms, A gun shop specializing in handguns.

2. The shop was full of customers - firearms customers.

3. To enter the shop, the robber had to step around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door.

4. A uniformed officer was standing at the counter, having coffee before work. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up, and fired a few wild shots from a .22 target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, the police officer with a 9mm Glock 17, the clerk with a .50 Desert Eagle, assisted by several customers who also drew their guns, several of whom also fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by paramedics.

Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt in the exchange of fire. Here we are at the beginning of March and we already may have the 2005 winner of the Darwin Award. This guy is going to be hard to beat.

Lets analyze this a bit, shall we?

1. His target was a firearm shop.

Look, we know criminals are stupid, but how stupid can you get? He must have known that a gun shop was full of guns. And ammunition. The only more difficult store he could have robbed was....Fort Knox?

2. The shop was full of gun customers

Yes, people who visit gun shops regularly will often carry a loaded weapon. What a shock.

3. To enter, he had to go around a marked police cruiser.

He didn't even think about stopping. He went straight in, with no chance to escape. He saw a marked police vehicle on his exit route and still went in.

Alright, now that we have the circumstances, lets nitpick the "robbery."

There was a uniformed police officer at the counter. Remember, the man could have still gotten away scot-free, but he had to pull his gun out and announce a holdup.

His gun was a .22 caliber. This is one of the smallest caliber weapons you can get. He decided to rob a gun shop with a little .22 gang-banger pistol. Amazing how he was met with fire from a 9mm, and the incredibly large .50 caliber Desert Eagle pistol.

I believe that this man is a prime candidate for a darwin award.

o_o

I must say that this pleases my misanthropic being right down to it's rotten core. One of humanities worst elements had 23 bullets deposited in his personage.

[fuzzyoctopus]

I am going to heartily agree with you.

[Maxwell]

natural selection at it's finest.
Darwin would be proud.

[Peter Ahlstrom]

http://www.snopes.com/crime/dumdum/gunshop.asp

It's actually true, though from 1990, and the version above is exaggerated...he was only shot 4 times, and the guns aren't the right kind, but other than that the details are pretty much right...

It's already on the Darwin Awards site.
http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1993-06.html

[Fellfrosch]

That's dang funny stuff.

[Mr_Pleasington]

That's funny.

My favorite Darwin Award ever was the guy who tied a bunch of big ballons to a lawn chair so it would float like a hot air balloon.  He took a shotgun with him to shoot the balloons and let himself down.  I think we all know how that ended.

[Oseleon]

Actualy, The baloon guy had a BB gun and he survived, but was jailed for the commotion it caused.  

Mythbusters Recreated the event for TV a few months ago.  

[Fellfrosch]

Yeah, they made a movie about him called, I think, Danny Deckchair. I haven't seen it. The whole business with the shotgun and him plummeting to his doom was an exaggeration that has grown into urban legend.

[Mr_Pleasington]

Hence, my version of the story.

[mulchNator]

Darwin awards make me laugh!:D

Stupid people shouldn't breed!