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Topics - RavenstarRHJF

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Reading Excuses / Sept. 6- RavenstarRHJF- Of Crowns and Kings, Ch. 1.2-3

« on: September 06, 2010, 05:49:47 AM »

Here's the rest of chapter 1- what I call sections 2 and 3. There may be a four based on feedback here. Otherwise we'll just move right along.

Quick synopsis of previous events:

Alexander is crown prince of a country called Arrelaine. His father is dying, and the bordering empire of Carn is about to invade, having left them alone for over a century.

No language, violence or sex.

Enjoy and tear into it!

Reading Excuses / Aug. 23- RavenstarRHJF- Of Crowns and Kings, Ch. 1.1

« on: August 23, 2010, 08:49:11 PM »

So yeah... here it is. Hope it was worth my extended absence and again, I will get to everyone else's stuff soon.

Music / Noteworthy's performance

« on: December 16, 2009, 04:52:36 AM »

So I just watched the premier of "The Sing-Off" on Hulu, and I've gotta say... Noteworthy rocked. I know a lot of the regulars here go to BYU, so I was wondering about your take on their performance. Or did you even know they competed?

Personally, I think it's about time for a show dedicated to a cappella music groups. I just wonder where Chapter 6 is... they should sooo be on this show!

Reading Excuses / Sept. 14- RavenstarRHJF- Stranded- part 2

« on: September 15, 2009, 03:21:06 AM »

Finally! I listened to you guys and put in more emotion. I have two iffy areas with this part:

1. I'll be the first to admit I'm not great at hard sci-fi, so any suggestions you can give me on the technical details would be much appreciated. (like why the moon has air. I need it to, but I don't know how to scientifically accomplish that, so it's just there.

)

2. I was considering an alternate ending, one that would focus more on life after the adventure. Do you guys think this one works, or should I go with the other one?

Don't hold back! And thanks for reading!

Reading Excuses / Aug. 31, Stranded, part 1- RavenstarRHJF

« on: September 01, 2009, 02:55:14 AM »

It turned out pretty long, and I didn't want to overwhelm anyone so you get it in two parts. Comments, criticisms, nitpickings... let me have it!

Oh, and thanks for reading.

Reading Excuses / July 6th, The Junction, Chapter 3/4- RavenstarRHJF

« on: July 06, 2009, 01:34:26 PM »

Let me know if anyone didn't get the email- I think I updated the list with all the new people. Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

EDIT: I just noticed that I apparently randomly switched the spelling of Taq's name in this submission. Just to let you know it's not supposed to be T-A-K, and that it's been changed in the original. Sorry!

Writing Group / Definition of "a"

« on: June 22, 2009, 03:18:08 AM »

My husband gave me this challenge as we were driving to church this evening: define "a" without using it ('cause, you know, it's a bad definition when you use the word your defining in the definition)

This is what I came up with: An English Language single letter descriptor of quantity (one) for people, places, and things

So I got to wondering what you guys could come up with?

Oh, and apparently it has to be grammatically correct.

Reading Excuses / June 15, The Junction, Ch. 4 - RavenstarRHJF

« on: June 16, 2009, 12:16:15 AM »

Ok, guys, I think I've finally got it. There are probably still some POV issues which I will just have to resolve later. I've already spent too much time agonizing over this section instead of writing new stuff, so...

That doesn't mean I don't want criticism, though! By all means, let me have it.

Reading Excuses / June 1, 2009- The Junction, Ch. 2 part 2- RavenstarRHJF

« on: June 02, 2009, 01:09:53 AM »

Like I said, this is extremely short. Basically, I decided to end the chapter before going on to a different view point, so this is just to end the chapter before moving on. That said, there's some important information here, so don't just treat it as filler.

Let me know what you think!

Reading Excuses / May 18th, The Junction- Ch. 2 part 1- RavenstarRHJF

« on: May 18, 2009, 07:49:41 PM »

This draft is still a little rougher than I would like, but last week was quite busy. Let me know about grammar and spelling, and otherwise just tear into it!

Reading Excuses / 5-04-09 Junction, Ch. 1 (complete)

« on: May 04, 2009, 10:56:50 PM »

It's the whole thing this time, I know it's a big chunk, but you'll get through it. I've made a lot of changes from the first submission, hope this one works better. Let me know!

I tried to add the most recent members to the list of emails, let me know if anyone didn't get the submission!

Writing Group / Exposition: What is the best way to handle it?

« on: March 30, 2009, 01:08:11 AM »

So we all know the standby of "show, don't tell," and most authors try to convey as much as possible through characterization and dialogue. But sometimes, especially in SF and Fantasy, there's just too much information critical to the reader's understanding of the world to go those routes. Maybe it would just take too long to have the characters talk about it, or maybe it would be out of character for them to talk about things in their world that they would have grown up knowing.

So my question is: At what point does an info dump become acceptable, and what is the best way to insert it in the main narrative?

Reading Excuses / 3-23-09 The Junction, Ch. 1-a by Ravenstar

« on: March 23, 2009, 03:45:03 PM »

Please keep in mind that it's only half a chapter, and some things will be explained in the latter half of it. Also, I was reading through it, getting it ready to send, and I noticed there was a lot of exposition. Is it too much? Not enough? Do I need to break it up more or have the characters explain things themselves? Looking forward to critiques!

EDIT: at least one person has asked me to send the second half of the chapter. Let me know if anyone else wants the second half as well; I checked, and it's about 2000 more words, so keep that in mind.