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Messages - Necroben

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1
Reading Excuses / Re: Not sure if anyone's seen this before....
« on: June 14, 2009, 10:16:17 PM »
Here's something y'all might find interesting:

http://rebeltales.com/rebel-tales-general-guidelines.php

2
Reading Excuses / Re: Email List + Submission Dates
« on: May 13, 2009, 07:15:30 PM »
I have to apologize that I haven't been active here lately.  I've got a lot on my plate with work, side jobs, and teaching.  I haven't forgotten y'all and I'm trying to get most of these stories read.  I look forward to all the new stuff coming in.  Sorry again.

3
Reading Excuses / Re: Writing Groups: An Essay by Dan Wells
« on: April 04, 2009, 06:01:25 AM »
I don't think there is a guide per sè.  It was more of how some people chose to formate their critique.

Thoughts while reading

General overview

Words of, and this is debatable, Wisdom

And a little encouragement, if one so desires.

At least this is how I interpreted the trend.  I could be wrong.  Hope that helps.

5
Books / Re: What are you reading, part 3
« on: March 27, 2009, 12:39:43 AM »
I guess I'm one of the few people who re-read a lot of books.  But that could be because I go through them rather quickly.  I've gone through my library at least twice.  I have to admit that I've re-read The Wheel of Time some-odd 20 times though. ;D

6
Books / Re: Best book you've ever read...
« on: March 25, 2009, 04:49:53 AM »
#4. The Vampire Earth books. This is the best series that no one has heard of. IMO the protagonist is the truest hero I've ever read about. A Vampire-type race from another world has enslaved the planet and turned the population into cattle. The protagonist is part of one of the small groups of resistance.

Who wrote them?  Sounds a lot like Brian Lumley's Source World stuff.

7
Reading Excuses / Re: 3-23-09 Reaves Crystalheart Chapter 13
« on: March 25, 2009, 04:25:26 AM »
Finally Aermyst felt his lungs empty and the cry cut off.
It seems that things are happening to Aermyst, or to Dantes, but not much of either of them doing things.  Maybe some more interaction, even if it’s just with the environment, on their part would liven it up.

He looked down at the edge of the wall; it would be so easy just to walk off the ledge and end it all.
After all’s said and done, that’s a really good turn of phrase.

I can kind of infer why Professor Trelawney doesn’t like Marlin, but it’s rather ambiguous at the moment.

All in all I like it.  It feels a little slow, but that might be just how it’s worded.  Marlin had a great scene.  Though I am wondering, and I might have missed this previously, how and why he’s entered into the school.

Keep up the good work! ;D

8
Reading Excuses / Re: 3-23-09 Aspirations Miranda 5-6
« on: March 24, 2009, 01:31:34 PM »
Thanks Ravenstar!

I'll work on Desmond's characterization some more.

9
Rants and Stuff / Re: Happy Things 2009: We're Still Here
« on: March 24, 2009, 04:34:21 AM »
Congrats, keep it up.  You can do it! ;D

Yeah, I found out the hard way that I'm allergic to the patch.  And the gum didn't really help.  If I'm gonna quite, its gotta come from just not wanting to do it any more.

But here's one to you for doing it.
**tips hat**

Good luck.

10
Movies and TV / Re: Sci-Fi Channel
« on: March 24, 2009, 04:28:59 AM »
Highlander would be cool! ;D

11
Reading Excuses / Re: 3-23-09 Aspirations Miranda 5-6
« on: March 24, 2009, 04:11:11 AM »
Thanks Reaves, that helped.  I'm trying to get better at all the, "I did this, and I did that" stuff.

I don't really understand how Desmond was able to drug her so openly in the club that her father owns. I know you mentioned that Miranda couldn't see any friendly faces, but I don't quite understand that either. Her father seems like the sort of man to have a tightly run ship and would not allow his own men to be replaced so easily.

As a general question as well:  How much farther along should answers be given?  I try to make every chapter into a mini story of its own, but I'll also string some information out into other chapters.  Is this a usefull technique?  Or should these things be tidied up fairly quickly?

12
Everything Else / Re: The heart attack grill
« on: March 24, 2009, 12:45:15 AM »
That is so awesome!  I've got to try that someday.  :o ;D

13
Everything Else / Re: Cool Stuff Found on the Internet, again
« on: March 24, 2009, 12:34:49 AM »
I use about that many tools, but that thing would be so unwieldy that it just wouldn't be worth it.

But do you use like 12 nearly-identical knives?  I mean, I can imagine using the pliers and screwdrivers and nailclippers and such (though, as you say, that tool would be too unwieldy to be practical), but an awful lot of those tools look to me like they would serve the same function.

Sorry.  I looked at it from the website and saw that they advertised something like 85 tools.  I carry at least that many with me but they are all different.  Though the difference might only be size in some cases

14
Reading Excuses / Re: 3-23-09 The Junction, Ch. 1-a by Ravenstar
« on: March 24, 2009, 12:26:29 AM »
…He said now.
Who said?  I figured it out after re-reading it, but it might help to go ahead and identify who’s saying what when you have more than two people.

… he looked more than usually distracted this morning…
This phrasing doesn’t really work for me.

Each T’Awn had…
Alright, so now I know what they are, a little.  Why are the wearing clothes?  Are they lizards or reptilian or something totally different?

A couple of years ago that would have been an unthinkable arrangement, but then, a couple years ago…
Here you kinda say the same thing twice and it might not be necessary.  You may want to thing about breaking up this sentence as well; it just seems too long.

… and yet they were deafened.
You might want to be careful of passive sentences.

Over all I liked it, but it did have a rather slow pace.  It felt like there was a little too much separation between the reader and conflict.  Things were happening but I wasn’t invested enough to care just yet.  It seems you’ve put a lot of effort into your world building, and as a reader I’m interested, but it is starting to get confusing.  Levels and the machinations in school and the purpose of the school, it’s just a little too much this early I think.  But, you have a great start here and I’m really interested in seeing were it goes.  Good job!

And you can send me the other half if you want. ;)

15
Writing Group / Re: What would be cooler?
« on: March 23, 2009, 05:49:29 PM »
To make the scene work I have to have her see all.  So I'm currently doing research in electromagnetism.

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