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Reading Excuses / Re: Ascension, Chapter 5 - 1/05/09
« on: January 11, 2009, 08:22:44 AM »
Well, any advice is welcomed. Ascension is probably going to be redone, as when I wrote all these I was on a deadline of three days each. However, I'm going to go back and take my nice sweet time on it.
If you're referring to me using the same words twice (excluding Dialogue), then it's because I don't pay much attention to that. While it makes it a little annoying to read, it's not really going to play apart in the Manga/Anime. That is, unless it's Dialogue that has a problem o_O. Though I'll probably make sure the words have a smoother flow just the same when I redo it. It doesn't hurt to get better at actually writing lol.
You say it's not drawing you in, and that you don't find it interesting. Can you be more detailed on why that is? I mean, is it Raven (LoL, I knew everyone would dislike him)? Is it the way I'm telling it? Can you suggest anything that would give it more life? Really the main things that I think matter are Dialogue, Imagery, Personality, Characters, and Plot. I'm sure there's other little details, but those are the main ones I think that should be focused on. Drawing emotions and showing them seems a lot easier to me than describing and writing about them x_x;. Though Dialogue would play a crucial role in that...
As for the United Union, Chaos was the one who came up with that lmao. I even pointed out to him that each word basically means the same thing XD (Might talk to him about redoing that...). Even though it seems a bit repetitive, I think with some adjustments it should be good for a Manga/Anime. Since showing is often much easier than telling, at least to me. Really though, anything anyone can think of that could make Ascension better is definitely welcomed.
If you're referring to me using the same words twice (excluding Dialogue), then it's because I don't pay much attention to that. While it makes it a little annoying to read, it's not really going to play apart in the Manga/Anime. That is, unless it's Dialogue that has a problem o_O. Though I'll probably make sure the words have a smoother flow just the same when I redo it. It doesn't hurt to get better at actually writing lol.
You say it's not drawing you in, and that you don't find it interesting. Can you be more detailed on why that is? I mean, is it Raven (LoL, I knew everyone would dislike him)? Is it the way I'm telling it? Can you suggest anything that would give it more life? Really the main things that I think matter are Dialogue, Imagery, Personality, Characters, and Plot. I'm sure there's other little details, but those are the main ones I think that should be focused on. Drawing emotions and showing them seems a lot easier to me than describing and writing about them x_x;. Though Dialogue would play a crucial role in that...
As for the United Union, Chaos was the one who came up with that lmao. I even pointed out to him that each word basically means the same thing XD (Might talk to him about redoing that...). Even though it seems a bit repetitive, I think with some adjustments it should be good for a Manga/Anime. Since showing is often much easier than telling, at least to me. Really though, anything anyone can think of that could make Ascension better is definitely welcomed.