Ahem...
You all have been bugging me to know what I would do if I were president. I have more than likely been pissing you off by saying," I will not give my ideas for what I would do if I was president, because I am not, and do not plan on becoming, president."
So here it is...
I would pressure congress into making a law that requires flue shots to every american citizen. It does not matter in age, size, race, religon, ect. Then I would work out a tax scam which included dropping a few dolars from every american with a wae of $55000 dolars or under a year. I would "find out" about my scam and blame it one hunderd percent on my secutary of treasury. He would go to prison for a very, very long time. I don't think I would like my secutary of treasury...
Then I would, if needed (which I don't think it would be) pressure congress into passing a law that evenly spreads the money the government lost across everyone and is to be payed as soon as humanly possible. I would do everything as the majority public wanted it for as long as it takes for this bill to be passed.
When this bill comes in and the government recieves it's due I would slowly seep money from the nuclear weapons and space exploration department and pay for a patented nano-bot like object. Let me explain these.
These nano-bots are so extremely small than theylatch on to your cells. It would latch on to every cell on your heart, brain stem and red blood cells in your body. They would be powered by body heat. Every citizen of the united states would volunteerly have them in their body. You wanna know why? Because I will get them into the manditory flue shot. If you are bad, I shock you to death by starting a chain reaction of electrical amplification in which an electical spark hits shoots from one, easily passes through your mostly water body, and hits an antennea on another and amplified. The process time estimated before your entire body shocks itself to death is less than half a minuite.
Once every citizen on the United States has these in him or her I would make an example of my cabinet and the audience of my state of the union address on live TV.
Once everyone understands their peril I will use the excact fequency shot out of eveyones brain. You know, the natural frequency of an object. I will take that frequncey and shoot it into everyones ear, hopefully wiping their memory clean by instantly destroying brain cells. A telephone, boombox or computer can do this easily. I will then cause everyone to believe I was their loving ruler and they wanted to go to war against Canada because of an unacceptable deed done.
Once we invade Canada, I will do the same there.
And slowly but surely I will own the world. The estimated process time after I become president is 15-30 years. That is why you don't want me as president. Of coarse, I might be better than Bush...
Gorgon the Wonder Cow