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Brandon Sanderson / Re: Warbreaker: Free Ebook
« on: December 19, 2007, 09:51:02 PM »
I just finished reading Warbreaker yesterday, and since it's a work-in-progress, I figured I'd give my opinion.
Overall, I liked it well enough. The prose, as with both Mistborn books, is competent. Often uninspired, perhaps, but it gets the job done and rarely knocks me out of the story. The first few chapters could use some extra polish, though; they seem a bit stiff and halting compared to the rest.
The characters are done quite well. Above all else, they're distinctive. Their personalities come across loud and clear through their dialogue, enough that with many of them you could remove the stage directions in a dialogue and I'd still have a good idea of who was speaking. Most are developed well, and dynamically so. They change and adapt, though at times it seems like their development is a series of big personal revelations in this direction or that, one after another. Vivenna was this way, and I found myself often wishing that the changes would be more subtle. Less "I was this, now I'm this, and here's why" and more showing the change through related thoughts and actions.
The plot was a bit...confused. Most of the issues are holes in the worldbuilding that others have already pointed out. Siri's plotline was strong, if slow-moving, but the others meandered a bit. Lightsong was very entertaining, but his chapters were more exposition than anything else until he decided to solve the "mystery." Vivenna's POV was more eventful, but she changed her purpose and direction often enough to make things vague and confusing. It went from rescuing her sister to protecting her homeland to helping her impoverished people and so on. Given all these changes, I would have expected more conflict with Denth/Tonk Fah, as their goals never changed. That said, most of it did the job and kept me reading until the end.
Until the end...which is the one part I seriously disliked. I know that the statues were mentioned often and foreshadowed and whathaveyou, but I still feel that using them is a deus ex machina, and an ugly one at that. Two reasons:
1) The statues were mentioned, but there was never any intimation that they might be something more than expensive ornaments. No air of mystery to them. It seemed like you could have simply chosen anything and used it to solve the Lifeless problem.
2) It doesn't make sense with regards to the magic system. IIRC, part of the reason why Lifeless are so cheap to create is that they have a human form and were once alive. The statues are in human form, yes, but were never alive. In terms of breath cost, shouldn't they fall somewhere in between the cost of a regular Lifeless and that of Nightblood (the former filling both requirements, the latter filling neither)? Whether that's 50 or 100 or 500 breath, it's still a lot, and even with the God King's vast store of Breath (10-20K?) that would only net you about 400 statues at most. Far fewer than the thousands that were in the city, though I'm not sure as to just how effective they'd be against the Lifeless. Maybe even a few would be enough. Still, there should be some sort of explanation in the book for why the never-living status of stone isn't a problem.
Also, with regards to the end, the big reveal of Pahn Kahl as the conspiracy fell flat for me. There's very little impression given in the book as to why they would orchestrate something like that. Sure, they had their land stolen from them in the distant past, but if they're still so pissed off about that, why do they never show it? Little is shown of the world outside Hallandren, so having everything hinge on a power that does reside outside the city doesn't carry much weight.
The setting (as usual) I think is the book's strongest point. Obviously, it's still very unpolished and all the holes in the worldbuilding need to be patched. In terms of ideas, though? Quite impressive, even if the magic system doesn't allow for amazing kung-fu showdowns like in Mistborn. I particularly like the fact that the magic is much darker this time around, that it carries a price as well as moral complications. The one thing I'd suggest improving here is the world outside Hallandren. The city itself is vivid (heh) and well-drawn, but it almost seems to stand alone in the world. There's little mention of trade or foreign policy or anything of the sort that isn't about Idris.
A couple other thoughts:
Nightblood. The sword was originally created to "destroy evil," but from the beginning you pass it off as evil in its own right. It is evil, of course, but I'm sure Shashara didn't think so, when she created it. So why did she make the sword black? Why name it Nightblood, a rather evil-sounding name? It's better to create an impression of the sword as something noble, like it was intended, so that when it's shown to be something very, very different, the effect on the reader will be all the more powerful.
Vasher's explanation of Breath and BioChroma and everything in the beginning comes off rather poorly. Not only is it a rather glaring infodump, but it also makes the magic system seem like one from a video game. He says he needs this number of Breath to do this and that number to do that, and I'm thinking I could just switch Breath for mana and nothing would change. It does change, once you get to Lightsong at least, and are shown the price of that magic. But it would work better if you could somehow work that price (and show it, not just have Vasher think about it) into the prologue.
Overall, I liked it well enough. The prose, as with both Mistborn books, is competent. Often uninspired, perhaps, but it gets the job done and rarely knocks me out of the story. The first few chapters could use some extra polish, though; they seem a bit stiff and halting compared to the rest.
The characters are done quite well. Above all else, they're distinctive. Their personalities come across loud and clear through their dialogue, enough that with many of them you could remove the stage directions in a dialogue and I'd still have a good idea of who was speaking. Most are developed well, and dynamically so. They change and adapt, though at times it seems like their development is a series of big personal revelations in this direction or that, one after another. Vivenna was this way, and I found myself often wishing that the changes would be more subtle. Less "I was this, now I'm this, and here's why" and more showing the change through related thoughts and actions.
The plot was a bit...confused. Most of the issues are holes in the worldbuilding that others have already pointed out. Siri's plotline was strong, if slow-moving, but the others meandered a bit. Lightsong was very entertaining, but his chapters were more exposition than anything else until he decided to solve the "mystery." Vivenna's POV was more eventful, but she changed her purpose and direction often enough to make things vague and confusing. It went from rescuing her sister to protecting her homeland to helping her impoverished people and so on. Given all these changes, I would have expected more conflict with Denth/Tonk Fah, as their goals never changed. That said, most of it did the job and kept me reading until the end.
Until the end...which is the one part I seriously disliked. I know that the statues were mentioned often and foreshadowed and whathaveyou, but I still feel that using them is a deus ex machina, and an ugly one at that. Two reasons:
1) The statues were mentioned, but there was never any intimation that they might be something more than expensive ornaments. No air of mystery to them. It seemed like you could have simply chosen anything and used it to solve the Lifeless problem.
2) It doesn't make sense with regards to the magic system. IIRC, part of the reason why Lifeless are so cheap to create is that they have a human form and were once alive. The statues are in human form, yes, but were never alive. In terms of breath cost, shouldn't they fall somewhere in between the cost of a regular Lifeless and that of Nightblood (the former filling both requirements, the latter filling neither)? Whether that's 50 or 100 or 500 breath, it's still a lot, and even with the God King's vast store of Breath (10-20K?) that would only net you about 400 statues at most. Far fewer than the thousands that were in the city, though I'm not sure as to just how effective they'd be against the Lifeless. Maybe even a few would be enough. Still, there should be some sort of explanation in the book for why the never-living status of stone isn't a problem.
Also, with regards to the end, the big reveal of Pahn Kahl as the conspiracy fell flat for me. There's very little impression given in the book as to why they would orchestrate something like that. Sure, they had their land stolen from them in the distant past, but if they're still so pissed off about that, why do they never show it? Little is shown of the world outside Hallandren, so having everything hinge on a power that does reside outside the city doesn't carry much weight.
The setting (as usual) I think is the book's strongest point. Obviously, it's still very unpolished and all the holes in the worldbuilding need to be patched. In terms of ideas, though? Quite impressive, even if the magic system doesn't allow for amazing kung-fu showdowns like in Mistborn. I particularly like the fact that the magic is much darker this time around, that it carries a price as well as moral complications. The one thing I'd suggest improving here is the world outside Hallandren. The city itself is vivid (heh) and well-drawn, but it almost seems to stand alone in the world. There's little mention of trade or foreign policy or anything of the sort that isn't about Idris.
A couple other thoughts:
Nightblood. The sword was originally created to "destroy evil," but from the beginning you pass it off as evil in its own right. It is evil, of course, but I'm sure Shashara didn't think so, when she created it. So why did she make the sword black? Why name it Nightblood, a rather evil-sounding name? It's better to create an impression of the sword as something noble, like it was intended, so that when it's shown to be something very, very different, the effect on the reader will be all the more powerful.
Vasher's explanation of Breath and BioChroma and everything in the beginning comes off rather poorly. Not only is it a rather glaring infodump, but it also makes the magic system seem like one from a video game. He says he needs this number of Breath to do this and that number to do that, and I'm thinking I could just switch Breath for mana and nothing would change. It does change, once you get to Lightsong at least, and are shown the price of that magic. But it would work better if you could somehow work that price (and show it, not just have Vasher think about it) into the prologue.