Real Life D&D

[Entsuropi]

America is Human.

Continental Europe is Elf.

Britain is Half-elf.

Japan is Gnomes.

Ireland is halflings.

South america is half orc.

Australia is dwarfs.

[Fellfrosch]

The Britain thing is kind of funny, but I don't get the rest of them.

[Entsuropi]

Hm. Australians drink a lot.
Japanese build groovy gadgets.
French (and other continentals) are annoying.
Americans are human so that the britain = halfelf works better.
Ireland... leprecauns anyone?
south america drew the short straw.

[The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers]

I thought you were saying South Americans were ugly. Which I suppose is still considered less racist than making Africa the full Orcs. Does this make the Middle East the land of Kobolds?

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

2 questions?
1. So do Austrialians drink more than the Irish?
2. How many frenchmen do you know?

[The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers]

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I can't wait till we're back to the point where I can mock the French mercilously without looking like I support the war in Iraq.

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

Seriously, I just hate being on the bandwagon,... don't you?

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

Which begs the question if America is historically the bastard Stepchild of Britain with a history of taking people from other countries then wouldn't we be the half elves and the half orcs?

[Entsuropi]

No. You see, we brits are the half way people. Halfway between america and continental europe (curturally).

Tony Blair was trying, before chirac screwed it all up, to have the UK be europes conduit to america, to us our halfway nature to elevate britain to a position of prominence within the EU. Unfortunately, that backfired due to the gulf war. So now the choice of US or EU is even starker than ever. And a more difficult decision.

The irish are halflings due to leprecauns. the australians are dwarfs since it fits better.

and i am british. 900 years of anglo french warfare means we cant stand the buggers and they cannot stand us.

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

Havent you guys been nominally on the same side for the last century?

[Fellfrosch]

I'd say that Germans drink more than Australians, and that dwarves build cooler things than gnomes do...but I don't know much about D&D gnomes so maybe I'm wrong on this point.

It's interesting to see your justification for making Americans human--you say you did it because it makes Britain's identity work better. I just assumed America was human because humans are the standard normal people and everyone else is kind of weird. Really shows off the differing national mindsets, eh?

[House of Mustard]

But also humans in fantasy are traditionally stupid and make rash, unthought-out decisions.  They're also usually pretty isolationist and xenophobic.  That fits well, I think.

[Fellfrosch]

I think the most interesting thing about humans, in both sci-fi and fantasy, is that they are allowed to do and be anything whereas other races end up with occupational and personality stereotypes. Look at Star Trek: humans run the spectrum of possibilities, but all klingons are violent and all vulcans are smart and all ferengi are greedy. Elves are wise and agile and become archers, while dwarves are gruff and drunk and carry axes.

I suspect that most people (Entropy excepted, obviously) would classify themselves as the humans and then find compartments for everyone else based on accepted stereotypes. How would an Australian or Japanese person make the same list?

[House of Mustard]

Well why don't you go and get all philosophical on us...

I think that the Japanese people would be too busy practicing their martial arts and building shoddy transistor radios to make lists like these.

Australians have lost too many fingers to alligators and wallabys to be able to write, so they're out (unless they dictated, in which case they's say "Yankees are gumwalloped blighty looders.")

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

hmm interesting reactions to this one today.