Oh yeah, the date is generally underused nowadays, and the sniper approach is fine as a way to get to know the girl (and the guy) enough to know you even want to ask on the date (or not to ask on the date). But if a guy is a sniper for too long, then the girl might write him off as not interested and go elsewhere. True True.
Of course, the friendship base is 'the dream' for a lot of us girls...uh, depending on the girl, of course. Maybe the key to not 'freaking' the girl out is is is...hmm, let me think here, is a combination of both...knowing the girl well enough that you can have a good conversation? Not making a big deal out of the date? I don't know. I do know that everyone is tired of games though.
Besides, sometimes girls DO know they would definitely not date a guy (even if they got to know him better), and it's best just to find out in the beginning, so you can be friends.
Poor guys! And poor girls! Man, I think it's a miracle anyone gets together, huh?