Inkling,
I'm in the same boat as you. I'm writing my third novel. I've written about a dozen serious short stories. I am (to date) unpublished.
I have also done a wealth of research on the publication world, because I've known I wanted to be "a writer" since about age 11. And I thought the book I finished at age 13 was a book. Hell, I thought the book I finished at age 23 was a book, but it wasn't.
By research, I mean that I've read about 40 books "about writing" (only 8 of them were worthwhile) and listened to at least thrice that many lectures/classes/podcasts.
Though not a "member" of the industry, my research indicates the following:
1. There is an extreme stigma against first-time authors. Familiarize yourself with the Steps experiment, in which an unknown author submitted an existing award-winning story and was universally rejected.
http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/hoax/archive/permalink/the_steps_experiment/Also familiarize yourself with the rejection stories of successes like Stephen King, J.K. Rowling, Brandon Sanderson.
The latter wrote 13 books before he was published. That's more than you and me combined.
2. There is an extreme stigma against self-publishing, and with good reason. It's taken as evidence that since no agent/editor was interested, the author basically paid an outside group to print his book. And basically, that's what happens. The success stories in self-publication are the exception, not the norm, and only after you've beaten tough sales standards will an agent or editor even touch you after self-publishing.
2.A. Self-publishing is an extreme amount of work, IF you plan to be financially successful at it. In addition to being the author, you must also be entrepreneur, marketing expert, market researcher, editor, promoter, and distributor. All things that are handled by others in the traditional publishing industry.
3. The best way to get published is to write consistently and submit hundreds of times, both novels and short stories. (I have not taken the latter step because after I truly understood what it would take to get published, I realized my writing had to reach a whole new level of expertise, and I am only now approaching where I'm aiming.)
3.A. And to keep writing without waiting for results. John Grisham's first book was purchased on a wing and a prayer, and didn't get good reviews, but it didn't matter. He'd already written a second, which was optioned by Tom Cruise before Grisham's first publisher rejected it.
4. Make sure a sizeable group of unbiased readers has already reviewed your work. And submit your 20th draft, not your 2nd.
5. Familiarize yourself with industry-standard formatting.
6. Texts I found helpful:
For an agent's view (someone who throws away hundreds of manuscripts a day after reading just one page) of the quality of writing, read Noah Lukeman's "The First Five Pages". It is an eye-opener on how writing is judged.
For Lukeman's view of the business, I recommend "How to Write a Great Query Letter" (free e-book) and "How to Get and Keep a Literary Agent" (which was about $3.00 as an e-book). I've read many others on writing...Orson Scott Card, Stephen King, and Lukeman's information is the most concise and the most-directed at first-time authors with no clue about the industry.
I'm asked every day "Have you ever thought about self-publishing?" and my answer is always the same. Not a chance, because I want to be acknowledged by the industry, as tough or biased or chancy as that may be.
I want a publisher to PAY ME for my work -- even if it's ridiculously low amounts -- than pay someone ELSE for the priveledge of printing me.
(And if I were published tomorrow, I would make way less than minimum wage on my current novel, even with an advance on royalties given to experienced authors, which I would not receive.)