Humor from Jack Chick

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

http://www.chick.com/articles/dnd.asp

read this article and discuss...

[MsFish]

http://www.humpin.org/mst3kdd/

Freaking hilarious.

On top of that, the second issue is that the materials themselves, in many cases, contain authentic magical rituals.

Impressive!  I didn't know that real sorcerers used D20s to cast spells.  

Incidentally, I was Wiccan in a former life (ie, before I joined the LDS church, when I was in high school) and I don't recall seeing ANYTHING that remotely resembled it in D&D.

 Erosion of family values-the Dungeon Master (DM) demands an all-encompassing and total loyalty, control and allegiance.

*Fish falls on the floor laughing

[cyan10101]

hmm, most of the things he discussed I did not agree with, atleast in my personal playing experience.  Also now that wizards has taken over d&d i feel it is less secret and more public friendly.  I mean it is freaking hasbro!  

The way he described the DM it seemed like he was some stranger that told them what to do.  He was talking about his DM and not his S&M right?  Also I have no clue what rituals for spells he is talking about.  The fact that they were very similar just doesn't make sense.  I guess going to the fridge to get drinks for friends is how you cast magic missile.  "harbinger you want a pepsi,  take a magic missile instead!  haha!"  I just think overall this guy is way too into his own world.

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

yeah, I wonder about those "rituals" as well. I've played every edition of D&D and except for spell componants I dont remember any detail about the occult discussed.

What gets me is that no one sues these guys for slander.

ohhh and dont forget the "new reasearch" that led to this Article.

http://www.chick.com/articles/frpg.asp

[MsFish]

Somehow I don't think "Flame Blade" is a popular occult spell.

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

it is among gay wizards...





_{this message is not endorsed by TWG, Or the Society of Gay Wizards}

[cyan10101]

I don't think this guy has been out since 1989.  Most video games have bad and good guys.  His whole thing about alignment as morality is just bonkers! (a bubble gum brand from the 80s, since this guy hasn't been out since the 80s.  Also in the commercials, huge pieces of gum would fall on people, hopefully this guy)

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

I read the Bible, does that mean that I will become a jerk like David?....

Just wondering...

[MsFish]

Oh, most likely.  


On second thought, I think you're more of a Korahor.

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

Thats sad...

Just for kicks you should see the Chick anti-mormon tracts... or not If you like not being filled with rage...

[MsFish]

I was kidding, silly.

So basically as Mormon gamers, we're going to all kinds of hell.

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

A special hell

[Eagle Prince]

Well we don't put the rituals out there for just anyone to see.  They are secret, which is traditional for the art.  The rituals are hidden in the game, and you can only begin unlocking them with rules mastery.

For all the new acolytes who may have never heard of rules mastery, this is when you have memorised and understand all or most all of the rules, especially important for the DM.  So once you gain rules mastery, then you will begin to unlock the true power.  Of course the first step in this is summoning up a demon, which you must either use your rules mastery to control, or it will kill you.

Okay then, have a nice day and keep on with the rules mastery.

Detective report: "No doubt D&D cost them their lives."

[Mad Dr Jeffe]

all I managed to summon up is Jack Chick... does that count?

[Eagle Prince]

Jeffe, you're dead to us, leave the table.