Timewaster's Guide Archive
Games => Role-Playing Games => Topic started by: Mad Dr Jeffe on November 11, 2005, 05:22:11 PM
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http://www.chick.com/articles/dnd.asp
read this article and discuss... :)
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http://www.humpin.org/mst3kdd/
Freaking hilarious.
On top of that, the second issue is that the materials themselves, in many cases, contain authentic magical rituals.
Impressive! I didn't know that real sorcerers used D20s to cast spells.
Incidentally, I was Wiccan in a former life (ie, before I joined the LDS church, when I was in high school) and I don't recall seeing ANYTHING that remotely resembled it in D&D.
Erosion of family values-the Dungeon Master (DM) demands an all-encompassing and total loyalty, control and allegiance.
*Fish falls on the floor laughing
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hmm, most of the things he discussed I did not agree with, atleast in my personal playing experience. Also now that wizards has taken over d&d i feel it is less secret and more public friendly. I mean it is freaking hasbro!
The way he described the DM it seemed like he was some stranger that told them what to do. He was talking about his DM and not his S&M right? Also I have no clue what rituals for spells he is talking about. The fact that they were very similar just doesn't make sense. I guess going to the fridge to get drinks for friends is how you cast magic missile. "harbinger you want a pepsi, take a magic missile instead! haha!" I just think overall this guy is way too into his own world.
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yeah, I wonder about those "rituals" as well. I've played every edition of D&D and except for spell componants I dont remember any detail about the occult discussed.
What gets me is that no one sues these guys for slander.
ohhh and dont forget the "new reasearch" that led to this Article.
http://www.chick.com/articles/frpg.asp
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Somehow I don't think "Flame Blade" is a popular occult spell.
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it is among gay wizards...
this message is not endorsed by TWG, Or the Society of Gay Wizards
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I don't think this guy has been out since 1989. Most video games have bad and good guys. His whole thing about alignment as morality is just bonkers! (a bubble gum brand from the 80s, since this guy hasn't been out since the 80s. Also in the commercials, huge pieces of gum would fall on people, hopefully this guy)
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I read the Bible, does that mean that I will become a jerk like David?....
Just wondering...
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Oh, most likely. ;) ;D :P
On second thought, I think you're more of a Korahor.
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:(
Thats sad...
Just for kicks you should see the Chick anti-mormon tracts... or not If you like not being filled with rage...
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I was kidding, silly.
So basically as Mormon gamers, we're going to all kinds of hell.
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A special hell
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Well we don't put the rituals out there for just anyone to see. They are secret, which is traditional for the art. The rituals are hidden in the game, and you can only begin unlocking them with rules mastery.
For all the new acolytes who may have never heard of rules mastery, this is when you have memorised and understand all or most all of the rules, especially important for the DM. So once you gain rules mastery, then you will begin to unlock the true power. Of course the first step in this is summoning up a demon, which you must either use your rules mastery to control, or it will kill you.
Okay then, have a nice day and keep on with the rules mastery.
Detective report: "No doubt D&D cost them their lives."
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all I managed to summon up is Jack Chick... does that count?
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Jeffe, you're dead to us, leave the table.
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wow, that is pretty good. WHo is this jack chick guy anyway. i have never heard of him before this.
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Jack Chick writes christian tracts... actually the articles your reading are from his "D&D expert" and posted on his website...
this was his initial attack against AD&D though
http://www.darkholmekeep.net/crusade/dd1.cfm
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A special hell
No, that's only for people who talk at the movie theater.
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Or letcherous old humps...
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I call heresy.
Everyone knows that this is a misrepresentation of MST3K. It's not MST3K without Joel (it was JOEL who made crow and tom, not Mike) and without the mad dr. and Frank.
anyway, every single time I read anything by Jack Chick, I think of the Book of Mormon scripture "Wo unto the liar, for he shall be thrust down to hell."
For someone interested in bringing people to Christ, he sure is a hatemonger who doesn't mind fictionalizing his sources. His "experts" are blatant liars and never in any AD&D book (I have read every core source book from the original book derived from Chainmail through Basic/Expert and all three and a half editions of AD&D -- still own most of them) has there ever been detailed information on how a real person can cast a real spell, and anyone spending 15 seconds to read the book will see that. I'm still waiting to see that info. I'd like to cast that mind spell on my wife so she'll buy me $200 in D&D rulebooks and miniatures.
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maybe he is a rogue and has ranks in bluff? not very many though.
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Oh, let's start a web rumor that Jack Chick is really an avid D&D player who writes all these articles because he's mad at his DM.
Jack Chick IS Blackleaf!
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I haven't laughed this hard or this much for a long time.
Eagle Prince, 42, cyan10101, I now demand an all-encompassing and total loyalty, control and allegiance from you.
*takes a sip of his refreshing beverage
Hey, that's not Pepsi!
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Erosion of family values-the Dungeon Master (DM) demands an all-encompassing and total loyalty, control and allegiance.
Like Jack Chick is himself trying to achieve? :x
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The Holy Trinity: Player's Handbook, Dungeonmaster's Guide, Monster Manual. Pay close attention to the covers, they hold alchemical and occult symbols such as the All-Seeing Eye, Eastern Star, etc.
I think these people are mad once D&D revealed to them that it will be rules-lawyers who will master the universe. They clearly have come to understand that Rules Mastery is the true path to occult power, but apparently could not achieve that power. So you are likely correct, Blackleaf is based on Jack Chick's own D&D experience! He failed to achieve rules mastery and true character optimisation, thus revealing a weakness that showed the DM that he did not have the nessessary appitude for true wizardry. So Jack got kicked out of the group, yes it seems to all make sense now...
Here are some quotes I liked:
"Our souls we will have forever, and what if they have been destroyed by playing D&D?"
"D&D is an extremely challenging game intellectually and emotionally"
"He is also pretty ignorant about hard-core occultism, as mentioned earlier, when he mocks the Necronomicon and claims it is entirely fictional"
"It has never been our contention that D&D alone turns people into drooling demoniacs"
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An interesting note, the guys writing these are like self-proclaimed High Priests of the church of Satan. Yes, interesting to say the least, hmm....
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*takes a sip of his refreshing beverage
Hey, that's not Pepsi!
Perhaps the drain-cleaner/rat poison combo is too noticible.
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that's magic missile baby! I would love to play a session with this guy. He hasn't really seen me play at all, he would know that d&d isn't as emotional as he says. I go through characters fast, most recent one lasted 2 sessions. Renzo is supposed to be dead Eagle Prince. You can't save them all! Long live chaos!!
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darth_hick, from you I also demand the whole loyalty/allegiance/control thing. Welcome to the site!
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sorry i got BJ signed up at work (as darth hick) and forgot i was signed on as him. that was my post dan.
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Renzo and Glim are still alive. Your characters shall never die, not on my watch, not even if it means becoming a god to bring them back, or blowing up the black hole on the mage ship to reverse time for a second chance. Whatever it takes, I will keep them all alive.
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blast!
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Gawd! Is that Chick still banging on about gaming as a pathway to Hell?
We all got really nervous about him for about a fortnight back in the early 90s here in the UK. :D
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Renzo and Glim are still alive.
...Or are they?
Bwahahahahahahaha!