You forgot to make a topic, so I made one for you.
I’m not real happy with the opening paragraph, it reads too much like a recap of the previous five chapters and I don’t think enough has happened yet to warrant a recap. The rest of it reads better, but it’s also a bit implausible, at least to me.
I’ll tell you why I’m having trouble believing what’s happening.
First, the last time Vara jumped from a high place was when she jumped off a roof. Later she’s surprised at the result, so she can’t have jumped like that often. So when Vara finds the leather ladder gone (where did she get such a thing, by the way?) why is she suddenly comfortable enough with her ‘magic legs’ to make the jump?
Secondly, jumping from that height with her eyes closed, is she stupid? I’m not sure she should’ve jumped in the first place, but doing it without seeing the ground and knowing when to relax her legs and when to brace? That’s nearly suicidal.
The first two points make me think Vara is rather stupid, and I’m sure that’s not your intent. What happens next only enforces this opinion. She never considered that none of the villagers, who keep pursuing and persecuting her, do jumps like she does? That doesn’t give her the slightest inclination to think that maybe she’s the only one who can? And if she’s so hunted by the villagers didn’t anyone refer to her as the ‘jumping monster’ or something to that effect? Never once?
For someone who’s persecuted like Vara is and who lives as a hunter/scavenger in the forest she lacks a surprising amount of situational awareness. She doesn’t see a huge branch she leaps at, she doesn’t know how high she jumped, she has no idea where Leo is leading her though she's lived in the forest her whole life. The Barbarian should be known to her, so logically she should’ve known where the lizard was leading her. Also, she when she finally notices the lake it takes her a whole conversation to notice the supposed smell of rotting fish, the piles of bones, etc?
It's like the world doesn't exist when she's thinking - that's a serious liability.
