Dalinar's gift and curse (lolSpoilers)

[rjl]

I think I'm on board with the idea that he asked to lose the pain of his wife's death, and the accompanying curse was losing all memory of her.

[Erunion]

I also think that's the right idea. I doubt that the wish had something to do with Navani, as I got the impression that he'd gotten over Navani after she chose Gavilar (?), met and sincerely fallen in love with a different woman, who he married. I also think that his wish had something to do with his wife, he likely wished the pain of her death to be taken away, and so he lost all his memories of his wife. The only question I can think of is when he went to the nightwatcher. I do think it likely that he drank so heavily on the night of the treaty signing, acting surly and completely ignoring his brother's advice, because of either his grief over his wife's death, or his grief at losing all memories of his wife.

[Cheese Ninja]

Do we know when he sought the Old Magic or when his wife died?  I'm sure the latter happened first, but is there any mention about whether these things happened before or after Gavilar's death.   Not that I think it actually matters, I'm just curious.  All I can find is "many years" ago.

One thing, I don't think the curse and the boon could be the same thing.  I think they are always separate.  This is pretty much our best source of information on the Old Magic so far:

“Doesn’t work that way,” Av said. “It’s not a game, no matter how the stories try to put it. The Nightwatcher doesn’t trick you or twist your words. You ask a boon. She gives what she feels you deserve, then gives you a curse to go along with it. Sometimes related, sometimes not.”

I can't decide if the memory loss is the boon or the curse, but I'm leaning towards curse.  Our other two examples of curses (given by Av, again) are two numb hands and seeing the world upside down.  Our one example of a boon is a bolt of cloth.  Av says that all his family regretted the curse except for his father.  The memory loss seems to fit with the other curses better than the boon.

[Stormblessed]

I would almost say that Dalinar's inability to hold the Thrill was his curse, but I'm pretty sure thats more related to the readings of tWoK and the highstorm visions than the old magic. But just putting it out there anyway.

[guy]

when did he go to the nightwatcher?  I think it would be helpful to consider the timeline, because it all probably happened long before Gavilar died

[MissGnomer]

When I read it, I felt all along that losing the memories of his wife was the curse.  I think that's supported by the line quoted earlier about "wasn't losing all memory of her enough?" 

One thing that hasn't been elaborated on very much yet in WoK is Dalinar's earlier consideration of killing his brother and taking the crown for himself.  He was a very different person back then, and his previous personality must be considered.  It would be helpful to know exactly when he went to the Nightwatcher, of course. 

I don't know; I just don't think his wish has anything to do with his forgotton wife.  Maybe it has to do with his earlier lust for the crown.  Hell, maybe the personality change is what he wished for in the first place.  "Please, Nightwatcher, make me a nicer guy.  kthx."