Is it just me, or did Aishia's reaction cut the divination short?
Also, good for her, deciding not to be willingly bound by a prophecy she doesn't like- although, she's really too young to realize the blessing of living an unremarkable life... adventures are seldom
comfortable.The Djinni made me laugh. I love how he so uselessly grants Aishia's wish, too. Princess of the kingdom of Pebble. Wonder if any Who's live on that?
...into the cool, dark of their plastered home...
Not quite clear what I'm supposed to be picturing here. Traditional woodframe house with whitewash? Adobe, a la Native American dwellings?
“Are you ready yet, child?” her mother called, coming from the market stall.
Metal jewelry clanked together as Aishia hopped around stork-like, lacing her sandal with both hands. Aishia wanted to protest.
The way you have these sentences arranged, it sounds like Aishia wants to protest about hopping around on one foot, instead of her mother calling her a child.
As the youngest of her sisters, it stood to traditional reasoning that she would get the best of the lot even if she wasn’t an orphan.
Maybe better to say that tradition favored her, or something like "the odds were in her favor." The above reads awkwardly.
Finally, the Diviner’s potion, now the consistency of goat’s milk, [had] turned green and was and Aisha was beckoned to the back of the tent where a fire was blazing. ...Aishia watched the red flame’s reflection danced in the water’s reflection.
Watch your "to be" verbs.
You also want to be aware of what your characters have picked up/are holding. When Hajel picks up the bottle and points at Aishia, does she leave Aishia holding the bowl by herself? Or does she both hold the bowl and pick up something else and point?
She held the helm of a sword
Are you sure you meant "helm" and not "handle"?
