Local Authors > Stephanie Fowers

Starving Artist Guide

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guitarbabe:
Okay, I'm starting a list of survival tips for starving artists...and since I figure most of us are starving artists here, we just might need the guide...well, at least I'd appreciate the tips.

So, I'll start it off. Here's my first one...water. Yep, it's my best friend. You can add it to shampoo, conditioner, make-up (not so helpful to the guys, sorry), lotion...it makes the shelf life of the typical household item last that much longer (well, you know as long as it's not electric)...and you can get all that gunk that sticks on the bottom, you know, that stuff. Oh, but don't use it on nail polish...well, you can if you're conducting an experiment.

Alright...annie body else? (man, that is such an Annie line...I love that show...the old one, not the new one), anyhoo, let's hear it!

Gemm: Rock & Roll Star; Born to Rock:
Canned goods. Really, they're not just for the homeless.

Find a restaurant that has one-two days a week where they serve all-you-can-eat spaghetti (means one, MAYBE two plates) for $2.25. That's right. Buffalo rocks harder than you thought, eh?

Get a job at a restaurant. That's how I've survived for a while. But now my time there is done and I have to find something else (being Target, but very little free food).

Gain lots of weight so you can pretty much eat less than you normally would on any given day due to having an overabundance built up already (like a freakin' bear!).

Mooch. Or go to events where there'll be free food.

Is it a good thing that I know all this, am only 20, and have been living on my own for about almost a year now? Ah well, that's what I get for giving my body hell I guess. Hahah.

Enjoy meatbags.

The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers:
Kill your Tivo. Stop paying for cable. go back to dial up internet. Cancel your magazine subscriptions.

All the above are luxury items that so many people think they need. If I ever hear people complain about not making ends meet and I find out they're doing any of the above, I instantly lose pity for them. If they do more than one, I want to stab the whiny git in the face.

guitarbabe:
Okay, how about this? I totally agree...with the above anyway...but bargains. Oh yeah! For rent (at least in this Provo college town), find a contract two weeks into the semester (that calls for knowing someone, having relatives around to live close enough to get to school and all that)...but, that's when everyone is desperate to sell. We got our awesome place for an awesome deal...and even though we don't have Tivo, we get everything else (cable, internet) free! Hey, that's my second tip...the bargains.

Oh, and z eats e, we're called the institute crashers here. Well, seriously, you can never starve if you go to every activity, FHE, institute, birthday parties, any party. And on the up side, you get to be social.

Spriggan:
how 'bout this?  Get a real job you freaking Hippies.

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