Author Topic: Warbreaker: Free Ebook  (Read 151980 times)

EUOL

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #135 on: September 06, 2006, 07:39:19 PM »
Matt,

I really do appreciate the in-depth comments.  This is exactly what I'm looking for.

I don't intend this to be specifically YA, but my 'adult' fantasy books have a lot of crossover.  They're aimed at that undefined 14+ fantasy audience.  Somewhere in the same place as Anne McCaffery and that bunch.  (Which means not as specifically targeted at adults as China or George R. R. Martin.)

Anyway, here's today's chapter (or, rather, the second half of last week's chapter!)  Enjoy!

http://www.brandonsanderson.com/graphics/WarbreakerCh23Parttwo-1.0.doc
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Spriggan

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #136 on: September 07, 2006, 03:35:31 AM »
you know, and this is just the webguy in me, you probably should have created a new folder for these warbreaker chapters since it drives me crazy that they're in a graphic folder.  I created a draft>>Warbreaker folder for you and placed all your chapters there, don't worry the originals are still where you originally posted them.

You writers and non-chalet attitude towards folder names.

Anyway I've added a warbreaker book page here

Draft Chapters are located here and since I'm so cool, any file you place in the draft warbreaker directory will automatically appear on that page.
« Last Edit: September 07, 2006, 04:07:10 AM by Spriggan »
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The Holy Saint, Grand High Poobah, Master of Monkeys, Ehlers

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #137 on: September 07, 2006, 09:24:37 AM »
it's true. very few writers use chalets for their folder names.

Spriggan

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #138 on: September 07, 2006, 01:46:40 PM »
Stupid spellchecker.
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dreamking47

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #139 on: September 07, 2006, 04:23:28 PM »
Quote
Hmm... Warbreaker is certainly not meant as a YA novel. Have you read Brandon's other books that have been published so far? As far as I know, it's supposed to appeal to the same crowd.


I've read Elantris but not Mistborn, so by way of comparison Warbreaker has certainly seemed more YA than Elantris (which I can see as occupying that McCaffrey-like middle-ground). The characters themselves in Warbreaker are younger (be it in age like the sisters, memory like Lightsong, or young in experience like Susebron); they are less tried, experienced, and (therefore) skillful, so spend much of the book being told what to do by adults; and there is, if you'll forgive me for saying so, a certain unreal simplicity of character and (occasionally) plot device that says "YA" to me (or in some ways teen-focused manga/anime: the young women with exaggerated characteristics and ever-changing hair). Most of the characters, when we're introduced to them, have a single defining signature trait. The story seems to be about these one dimensional characters becoming two dimensional, gaining a second trait and learning to balance the two. That to me is a YA construct. A one-dimensional character from an adult perspective needs be someone childishly simple, dangerously obsessed or completely deranged, while a young adult character with a single dimension can, in the new world of YA fiction, just be someone who needs to grow up a bit. Acquiring and balancing new core traits is after all probably the central activity of young adult life; it's how young adults become grown adults.

Cross-over between YA and adult genres can happen in both directions, of course: the Harry Potter books are the quintessential example of YA books embraced by an adult audience. I'm 32 and while I do usually go in for the Martin/Mieville style of fiction, I also find Eoin Colfer's Artemis Fowl books (which are full of characters with only one initial dimension) to be a lot of fun -- although in a very different way. I made the remark about YA in my original post to let you know that I was giving my comments based on trying to look at Warbreaker in that different way, focusing less on "is it okay to have characters each with only one signature trait" and more on "how effectively are those signature traits presented?"

That being said, I don't know precisely what is or is not a YA novel -- I know some people here work in the publishing field and perhaps have a working definition. However I'm not arguing that Warbreaker is a YA novel or should be marketed as one, just saying that so far it's felt like one to me, so I was critiquing it as one. I don't know what the end, or successive drafts, will bring.  If this first draft is essentially a prose outline of the novel-to-be's structure, then perhaps much of the YA factor -- to the extent it is unwanted -- will be taken care of by further drafts.  That's part of why I tried to keep my comments focused on structural matters with what's written now, so they're relevant however many layers are added on in the future.

MattD
« Last Edit: September 07, 2006, 04:40:31 PM by dreamking47 »
"It had blood in it.  That makes it a good metaphor." -- Tonk Fah, in EUOL's Warbreaker

Peter Ahlstrom

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #140 on: September 07, 2006, 07:10:05 PM »
Matt,

Thanks for your outsider's perspective analysis on what differentiates a YA book. I hadn't personally heard that particular analysis before, and though I'm not a YA person myself, I find what you said very interesting. I'd like to hear Stacer's take on it.

I don't personally think Warbreaker would work as a YA, so the parts which are too YA might need addressing. I'd be tempted to hold off judgment until the end, but then again NOT being able to read ahead and see how it all works out is a benefit when the author wants feedback on what does and doesn't work in the earlier sections of a book.

My wife reads a ton of YA, and we recently read The Dark is Rising (just that particular book at the moment, not the others in the series yet), and it annoyed me how the main character was just along for the ride throughout the whole book. None of the decisions he made seemed to me to be actual decisions. Perhaps if I had read and loved the book as a child it would now resonate with me in some other way, but as it is I found it hard to get into.

But this could be a discussion for another thread.
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EUOL

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #141 on: September 13, 2006, 04:23:49 PM »
Wednesday Warbreaker

www.brandonsanderson.com/drafts/warbreaker/WarbreakerCh-024-1.1.doc

With thanks to my brother for the auto-updating folder.  Also, big thanks to my lovely wife, who proofread this copy so that you don't have to deal with my terrible typo fetish.  
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Pemberley

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #142 on: September 13, 2006, 06:03:28 PM »
Aw, shucks!  It was nothin'.  I'm curious to see what people say about Blushweaver and Lightsong's witty banter.

Kuntrey_Pilgrum

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #143 on: September 17, 2006, 02:31:24 PM »
I personaly LOVE Blushweaver! In real life, I would have to throttle 'er, but, like Gilmore Girls, the gal's great when someone else has to deal with her. ;D
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EUOL

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Kuntrey_Pilgrum

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #145 on: September 20, 2006, 07:55:40 PM »
That map was actually quite good!  What's more, the fact that the Well of Accension is where it is DOES explain the whole nuclear winter thing better....

Sorry Ookla! If you thinks I need to E-D-I-T then I will.
« Last Edit: September 20, 2006, 11:04:20 PM by Kuntry_Bumpken »
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Peter Ahlstrom

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #146 on: September 20, 2006, 09:26:05 PM »
That could be considered a spoiler, you know.

[Actually that comment was directed at Brandon, since he made the map.]
« Last Edit: September 21, 2006, 12:12:14 PM by OoklaTheMok »
All Saiyuki fans should check out Dazzle! Emotionally wrenching action-adventure and quirky humor! (At least read chapter 6 and tell me if you're not hooked.) Volume 10 out now!

joevans3

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #147 on: September 21, 2006, 11:45:12 AM »
Hello,
I am really enjoying this book so far.  
What I would really like to know is if there is a way to upload my own files to this forum, or contribute a file in some way.  I am working on the FTP thing at work to see if I can use my server there to host it.  The reason I ask is because I just read Part I and I really liked it, but I was distracted by the spelling errors, so I redlined the whole thing.  Could I volunteer a version that is edited a tiny bit, or is that taboo?

As to the substance, after Part I, I was not sure whether this was going towards a beauty and the beast thing, or a rapunzel thing (with the hair and the father figure issues.).  After reading some of the drafts of Part II, it is looking more like beauty and the beast.  I don't think that is bad, it just means this is a classic story. By the way, I think Part I was looking at the really intersting idea of what happens when a father is too weak to sacrifice his firstborn.  I would like to see that developed, but it looks like it is getting buried in the other stories (and will be redeemed by a happy ending).

I think one thing that could help the story is an evil character.  The only obvious villain is Nightblood, and he seems to be kind of a comic relief.   Vasher, obviously, is an intriguing antihero, but no villain.  Blushweaver obviously has motives opposed to our heroines.  Perhaps the priests do as well.  But this has not been fleshed out much.  The act of taking someone's breath seems to be considered evil by our heroines and a few others, but to really solidify that, I think it would help to see someone else taking breath (Blushweaver maybe?) and enjoying it, or doing something else obviously evil. Maybe the point of view of someone who's lost breath would help?  Obviously, this process is not supposed to "hurt" but just sort of numb somebody, so that may be difficult to illustrate.  Maybe flash back to how Jamine(the girl mercenary, I forgot her name) was before the taking?  Show how she likes colors?

Anyway, the spelling was a distraction, as was the use of ellipses.  Maybe it could work if one character used that form of speech/thought, but it seems that the entire world is afflicted with. . . Captain Kirk-itis.

I started reading Part II (I couldn't resist).  Please, please, please fix the spelling for mussels from muscles, unless you are trying to start your "pun" fantasy now.  It is really really distracting when a group of characters is sitting around eating "muscles."

Anyway, keep writing, I can't wait for the rest.

-J

« Last Edit: September 21, 2006, 03:37:12 PM by joevans3 »

Peter Ahlstrom

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #148 on: September 21, 2006, 12:23:09 PM »
Joe, Brandon is notorious for his spelling (though not as notorious as his brother) and is well aware of it. I had the impression he was not looking for word- or sentence-level edits on this first draft, just more general comments on the characters and plot, which are much more important to his writing process at this stage. Spelling is one of those things that can wait until a much later draft to get fixed.

I know the temptation to line edit is one that can be hard to resist, though. :)
All Saiyuki fans should check out Dazzle! Emotionally wrenching action-adventure and quirky humor! (At least read chapter 6 and tell me if you're not hooked.) Volume 10 out now!

joevans3

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Re: Warbreaker Sample Chapters
« Reply #149 on: September 21, 2006, 03:46:28 PM »
Thanks for the insight into the writing process and the author.  

Maybe in a book that is being released online, one could accept some editing along the way to allow for easier access by the rest of the public (even if it will all be redrafted at some point anyway).

I am curious to see how substantive redrafts affect the read.

-J ("the Anal")