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Author Topic: Jokes!  (Read 3528 times)

Lord_of_Me

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Jokes!
« on: October 04, 2002, 02:32:57 PM »
in the news today there was a list of the most popular jokes:

Top joke in Scotland: I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror like his passengers.

Top joke in England: Two weasels are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, "I slept with your mother!" The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, "I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!" The other says, "Go home dad you're drunk."

Top joke in USA: A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course.

He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man." The man replies: "Yeah, well we were married 35 years."

Top joke in Belgium: Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks.      

which is your favourite? mine is the the first one
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Entsuropi

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2002, 03:19:20 PM »
yeah i headrb bout that.
i particularly liked the fact that they discovered that scots found jokes less funny in general than the rest of britain (it was welsh, english, irish then scots in descending order).
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Fellfrosch

Lord_of_Me

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2002, 03:22:30 PM »
the most disturbing thing was that germans found everything funny
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Tage

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2002, 04:11:26 PM »
Hey! Germans are very cheerful people. I lived there for two years, you know.
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stacer

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2002, 04:35:25 PM »
Speaking of scots (well, you were a minute ago), I'm going to be in your neck of the woods soon, Charlie--you are in Scotland, correct? I just found a really sweet deal--$340 round trip Chicago to Glasgow. I'll be doing a bit of a family history vacation come Thanksgiving. I'm really excited. So it's not going to be the warmest time of the year to go, but I don't care. I can afford it, that's what matters!

Total tangent, but had to share.
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Fellfrosch

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2002, 05:05:37 PM »
I wonder how they decided what was the top joke in each area.
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Entsuropi

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #6 on: October 05, 2002, 09:18:16 AM »
good question. ismir, do u have the address of teh site?
maybe they made it so u had to register, and during the registration process, u had to choose ur country.
actually, i wonder if anyone from iraq voted? be fun to see what they liked.
stacer :  ;D
be careful in glasgow :P oh and go to see the burrell collection. ive heard its really good.
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Lord_of_Me

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #7 on: October 05, 2002, 06:13:36 PM »
http://www.laughlab.co.uk

the story i got was copied from aol news
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Spriggan

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #8 on: October 06, 2002, 07:35:50 PM »
Here's the best tested joke in the world :
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,64752,00.html

it's a story about the above mentioned site.  Anyway I love the Dave Berry part.
« Last Edit: October 06, 2002, 07:40:09 PM by Spriggan »
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Slant

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Re: Jokes!
« Reply #9 on: October 29, 2002, 03:02:05 AM »
Very funny.  I still like the old redneck jokes.

if ya think Al Pacino is a highfalutin' coffee drink, you might be a redneck.

If ya think Dom Perignon is a Mafia boss, you might be a redneck.

If ya think the last words to the National Anthem are "Gentlemen, start your engines," you might be a redneck.
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