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« on: September 06, 2006, 12:27:34 AM »
I, like most posters thouroughly enjoy your work. I found it through a friend's blog site. I find it orginal and refreshing. That said I suppose a few comments are in order.
I understand the oposing character types of the sisters but they are sisters, shouldn't they be somewhat alike? I also understand Vivenna being so stubborn, but I need to see her character come to realize she may have to get even more dirty than she is now to accomplish the things she sets out to. I would actually play with the idea of her being tempted to take more breath later on when she might possibly be learning to Awaken. At some point she'll have to accept that the two oposing religions came from a singular one. She could possibly find that religion and taking it as her own she might accept breath/color? Maybe Tonk Fah is a follower and through some history into her people's ancestors, the original outcasts, she could become a follower? I would enjoy finding more out about them and their powers that seem to be unknown by their holders and feared by their enemies.
I too enjoy Vasher/Nightblood and want more still. I think you might need to flesh out their relationship some more or maybe it's just part of the mystery yet. I like to imagine his purposes are his own and selfserving, that he may be a hindrance but will find his goals easier to achieve through helping Vivenna, though Tonk Fah would never trust him and does want to kill him. However, being a mercanary will acdept it at Vivenna's order or at least so it seems, he did say he can quit any time...
I can't wait to see where you're going with the Lord Ruler's character! It's very interesting to think he is merely a pawn. The relationship between the two religions can also be explored here. The Risen having been caused by the absence of the outcast?
What's the deal with the nobles hair color change? I think it needs a functional purpose. This might be explored or found out by Vivenna when the war begins and can use it to her advantage.